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Jonah’s Story: Tall Tales

Jonah’s Story: Tall Tales

Strange Brew Kills What’s Inside of You
What Kind of Fool are You?

Strange Brew


Rebeka and I took first watch and Wodin stayed up with us. He was Drunk on two cups of Rye.
“Where did you get this Outrageous Hooch from?” Wodin asked.
“Liquor Store.” I answered.
“I have to admit I’m Feeling a bit Tipsy. Your Rye has gone Straight to my Head.”
“Lightweight.” Rebeka replied.
“Do you like Stories, Young Sister?”
“Depends on the Story.”
“Indeed it Does.” Wodin grinned. “Shall I Tell One?”
“Please. Do.” She said.
“This is the Tale of a Man called Jarl who lived long ago in the Age of Heroes.”
“This sound Promising.” I said.
“Jarl had humble beginnings as a Blacksmith: One of the best in All the King’s Land. Men came from far and wide to commission his work. He was Paid well and Lived in Comfort with his Wife and Children until the Black Plague came to Visit. One by one the Plague took his entire Family, but his own Life was Spared.”
“This Tale is Depressing.” Commented Rebeka.
“Be Patient, Sister. This is just Prologue. So Times were Tough throughout the King’s Land. No household was spared by the Plague.”
“Still Depressing.”
Wodin ignored her. “So Jarl Left it All Behind: his Home and his Forge. He was Lost in his Greif and Wandered like a Blind Man without a Cane. Eventually Jarl Wandered to the Sea and considered throwing Himself off the cliffs to his Death. But One Thought stayed his Hand.”
“What?” I asked.
“‘To Whom will I leave my Legacy.’?”
“What Legacy?” Inquired Rebeka.
“Say what?”
“Just Listen, Little Sister.”
Rebeka reluctantly shut her Trap.
“So there Jarl was looking across the wide sea and the Gods touched him as They are wont to do. Suddenly, he felt the call of the sea as Clear as I am talking now: ‘Come Sail Away with Me.’ So he did.”
“Did what?” I asked.
“Sailed Away, of course.” Woden replied.
“To Where?”
“Say What?”
“To the Far Horizon. But that’s another Tale for another Night. Excuse me, Jonah, but I must Retire. Thank for the Rye and the Company. Excuse me, my Lady.” With that, Wodin wandered off to Sleep under the Trees.


Jonah’s Story: Wodin

Jonah’s Story: Wodin
Feeling Paranoid, True Enemy or False Friend?
Anxiety is Attacking me and my Air is getting Thin.
I’m in Trouble for the things I haven’t got to yet.
I’m Chomping at the bit and my Palms are getting wet.
Sweating Bullets!

Sweating Bullets


That Day was like any other with exception of the two Ravens who kept Following us Around. They’d been with us since Dawn. I’d even tried to scare them off with a couple shots from my Twelve Gauge. Didn’t work, so we just tried to ignore Them.
When we stopped for the Day, I realized the Ravens were no longer with us. “Jo, did you see when the Ravens left us?”
“Rebeka did you see the Ravens leave us?”
“Sure. They just Left.”
“Which way did They go?”
“Dunno. Why do you give a Shit?”
“Cause I Felt like They were Watching Us.”
“They’re just Birds, Jonah. ‘Eff ‘em!” Declared Jo.
So then we set up camp in silence. It was my turn to cook, so I decided to make my World Famous Fish Stew with Bacon. By the time the Stew was done we were all famished. We ate well and then fired up our Pipes. High Living.
“What was that sound?” Asked Rebeka.
“What sound?”
“I just heard a twig crack over there.” Rebeka pointed ‘over there’ with her Beretta.
“Don’t shoot!” A voice from the Darkness: “I’m unarmed.”
“Show yourself!” I yelled.
“Here I am. Just an Old Man with his Staff.” And so he Was. He wore a long, gray cloak and a pointed hat several sizes too big for his Head. He had a patch over his Left Eye.
“Who are you?” I demanded.
“I am.”
“Whatever.” He replied.
Jo whispered: “Jonah, I think he said ‘I am’”
“So he did. What’s your Name?”
“Wodnesday. My friends call me Woden.”
“Fair enough, Wodnesday, where did you come from?”
He pointed with his staff. “Over there.” He said with a chuckle.
“Funny. What’s your Diagnosis?”
“Are you Alone?”
“Yes . . . I mean no. I have my Ravens.”
“Those birds are Yours? They’ve been following us All Day.”
“So have I.” Woden declared.
“You are the first Humans I have seen in a month of Sundays.”
“Do you have something to Eat?” Inquired Woden. “Something Smells Delicious.”
“Jo, fix the man a bowl of Stew.”
“Do you have any Mead, perchance?”
“No. How ‘bout some Rye?”
“Wonderful! I haven’t had a drink for Some time Now.”
“Have Your Ravens eaten?”
“I don’t know. Huginn and Muninn usually find something along the Way. I’ll ask. Caw Caw Caw?” He croaked.
“Caw Caw Caw.” The Ravens replied.
“They are Hungry.”
“Jo. Two more bowls and a shot of Rye, Please.”
“Bless you, Friend.”
“You’re Welcome, but I ain’t your Friend, Brother.”
Woden frowned. “Apologies, Sir.” He took the bowl and cup from Jo. “Thank you, Sister.”
Woden was silent as he and the Ravens ate. Jo and I cleaned up while Rebeka kept watch.
“How bout another shot of Rye?” Asked Woden.
“Jo?” I asked.
“Sure, Boss.”
“Thank you. I do enjoy the Effect of Spirits on my Spirit.”
“Your Welcome.”

Copyright 2014 Joel Paddon


Because the Night Belongs to Lovers

Because the Night Belongs to Lovers.
Because the Night Belongs to Us.

Because the Night
Patti Smith

We’ve been together a fortnight now. No Others have Appeared, but Jo found a body last Tuesday. It was so decomposed she could not tell if it was a man or a woman. When we sleep, two of us are always on watch. That means we are always sleep deprived and slower Mentally. I guess that’s the Price You Pay for Vigilance.

We always pull second watch together, so we know each other well, very well, by now.
Last night we talked in a typical way: “You wanna talk more about my baggage Jonah?” Rebekah laughed.
“Well my suitcase ain’t exactly a carry-on bag, I hate to admit. Why don’t you tell me about that Dream you had last Night?”
“Which one?” She replied.
“The one with the Hawk.”
“Oh yeah. Wait. How did you know . . . ?
“Uh, um, Lucky Guess.”
“Yeah, right! Anyhoo: the Dream starts with me skinny dipping in the Ocean.”
“Good Start. Is it night or day?”
“Night, I think . . . No . . . Dawn. Anyway . . . There is a new Moon and the water is freezing, so I’ve got nipple hard-ons.”
“Sweet! I’m with you so far.”
“Then I get out, grab a towel and dry off.”
“So as I dry off, I notice motion out the Corner of my Eye, and I look around and see a large bird standing about twenty feet away. I cannot tell what kind it is a first, so I slowly walk toward it.”
“Didn’t you scare her away?”
“Surprisingly, no.” She replied.
“Then what happened?”
“I saw in fact she was a Red Tailed Hawk. Then she started to talk to me.”
“What did the Hawk say?”
“‘Who are you?’”
“No shit?”
“No shit.” Rebekah replied. “‘My name is Rebekah. Who are you?’”
“Then the Hawk asked ‘Why are you here?’”
“‘I don’t know.’ I said.”
“‘Well, Rebekah, how can you get to Where you’re Going if you don’t know the Way?’”
“Good point.” I conceded.
“So anyway,” Rebekah continued. “She said, ‘See you later.’ And then flew away over the ocean toward the rising sun.”
“Wow, what a Beautiful Dream . . .”
“I know, right? Please, Jonah, tell me what my Dream means!” She begged.
“Um . . . okay . . . I’ll give it a shot.” I mumbled.
“Thank you, Jonah.”
“So . . . Let’s See . . . When the Dream starts, you are skinny dipping in the Sea. Your nakedness symbolizes the Reclaiming of your Childhood Innocence. Are you in Touch with your Inner Child, Sister?”
“I think so.”
“Swimming is a Cleansing process – like Baptism. Finally, the Ocean is a Desert with its Life Underground, representing Hidden Strength and Potential Power.”
“O-kay?” She reacts: Incredulous. “Is that all?”
“Nope.” I shake my head. “Cold water means a Fear of Death. The hard nipples suggest Sexual Desire and Motherhood.”
“Dawn is straight forward: New Beginnings, Magic, Mystery and the Unknown Becoming Known.”
“Tell me more, Jonah! What about the Moon?”
“It was a New Moon, right?”
“The New Moon is the Phoenix: Death and Rebirth in the same Breath. Odin is the New Moon Personified.”
“Whoa . . .”
“Yup. Good Medicine. Now, the She Hawk is directly related to the New Moon.”
“Yes, it all fits together nicely. The She Hawk is a Messenger, the god Mercury: A message from the Universe. So pay attention to Her Words.”
“Thank you, Jonah!” She leaned in to Kiss me on the cheek. Sweet.
Copyright 2014 Joel Paddon